The Wave of the Future. Ad Hominem. Terrible Preservationists.

Round One: Skirmish
Chaodoom: because if there's one thing i'm all about, it's physical violence
mrsewan: lootin'
Chaodoom: and on some days, pillagin'
Chaodoom: (ha harrr)
mrsewan: pirates.. haha.
Chaodoom: you know what
Chaodoom: i'm over pirates
Chaodoom: vikings
Chaodoom: are the wave of the future
Chaodoom: despite being themselves very pasty pale, they were the original cracka stompas
Chaodoom: i mean lookit what they did to pretty much all of the british isles
Chaodoom: and a fair portion of western europe
mrsewan: FUCK THAT NORDIC SHIT
Chaodoom: dude
Chaodoom: Nordic Track been exercising the flabby masses since the way, way back
Chaodoom: you best show some respect
mrsewan: fuck you fatty.

Chaodoom: (p.s. Vikings even dance with their fucking swords. cheeyeck it: http://www.cvm.qc.ca/mlandry/folklore/vikings.JPG)
mrsewan: pirates can do that too
Chaodoom: look at that one on the right
Chaodoom: he looks so homosexual

Chaodoom: but you KNOW you don't want to fuck with him

mrsewan: i was kind of hoping this would be a moving picture
mrsewan: like a .gif
Chaodoom: shut your word-hole
mrsewan: you know what?
Chaodoom: dude. pirates need sumptuous, frilly boats
mrsewan: you're going on my "FUCK YOU" list
Chaodoom: because they're giant pussies
Chaodoom: vikings
Chaodoom: shit

Chaodoom: all they need is a hollowed out trunk
Chaodoom: and a sail
Chaodoom: http://www.jjcurling.k12.nf.ca/block/explorers_pics/vikings.jpg
Chaodoom: look at that shit
Chaodoom: Cap'n Blackbeard would shit himself and run away
mrsewan: haha
mrsewan: stop sending me viking pictures
mrsewan: vikings are so lame
Chaodoom: he'd be all like, "Waaaah how am I going to count my golllldddd in my frilly bedddddd"

Chaodoom: whereas Bjorn Fjordson here
Chaodoom: he's all like

Chaodoom: "Ja, eet ees cold. Vee vill sail south and pillage."
Chaodoom: vikings - proactive
Chaodoom: pirates - pussy bitches
mrsewan: yarrr
Chaodoom: jaaaa

mrsewan: pirates have skull flags
mrsewan: what do you guys have
Chaodoom: you think john the baptist was just picking fights?
mrsewan: NOTHING
Chaodoom: WE HAVE THE SKULLS OF OUR ENEMIES
Chaodoom: our male enemies
Chaodoom: our female enemies
mrsewan: don't pull your religious allusions on me
Chaodoom: we keep THEM in our BEDS
Chaodoom: because we are fucking VIKINGS
Chaodoom: and we TAKES what we WANT
mrsewan: yea well you're a taiwanese former engineer
mrsewan: take that reality
Chaodoom: MY NAME IS ERIC
Chaodoom: ERIC -> ERIK -> ERIK THE RED
mrsewan: what Eugene was taken?
Chaodoom: VIKING BLOOD COURSES THROUGH MY VEINS
Chaodoom: i do not have to stand for this
Chaodoom: i'm gonna go hew down a mighty tree
Chaodoom: and smelt some iron
Chaodoom: and cave your face in with a battleaxe
mrsewan: snooooze
Chaodoom: that is correct
Chaodoom: pirates have to wait till everyone is snoozing before they attack
Chaodoom: you had better believe that people fucking flee in terror when they see vikings coming on the horizon
Chaodoom: we don't even need "surprise."
Chaodoom: shit
Chaodoom: there isn't even a word for "surprise" in the old tongue
Chaodoom: there are, however, fifteen variations on "kill," ten on "burn," and a walloping thirty-three on "smash."

Intermission:
Chaodoom: i'm taking the liberty of transcribing this conversation to my blog
mrsewan: haha
mrsewan: dude i was half assedly arguing for pirates
mrsewan: that's unfair

(Editor's Note: Yeah well you know what? Vikings don't have a word for "fair" either. Vikings - 1, Everyone Else - 0)

Round Two: Kathy Kim Starts Arguing In Earnest
mrsewan: pirates don't have to wait until people are snoozing to attack any more than vikings
mrsewan: they fucking pillage too
mrsewan: they are a more recent/modern equivalent of the vikings you git
mrsewan: they do the exact same thing, except they're not as outdated
Chaodoom: oh hoh.
Chaodoom: this just got more interesting
Chaodoom: please do not equivocate the noble viking
Chaodoom: wit your unwashed, grog-swilling, peg-legged, one-eyed motherfucker
Chaodoom: it insults the both of us
mrsewan: unwashed? hello vikings.
Chaodoom: we bathe
mrsewan: grog-swilling? hello vikings
Chaodoom: oh hells yes we bathe
mrsewan: peg-legged? ok, that's us.
Chaodoom: we bathe in the blood of the innocent
Chaodoom: while laughing
mrsewan: and mother fucker? that's totally you.
Chaodoom: and please. grog?
mrsewan: we have PARROTS. we have class, style.
Chaodoom: mead, honey.
Chaodoom: yeah. right.
mrsewan: we have fancy boots.
Chaodoom: parrots
Chaodoom: the animal
Chaodoom: that got gilbert godfrey
Chaodoom: as a voice
Chaodoom: dripping with class there
Chaodoom: besides
mrsewan: ok just because you had to read beowulf doesn't mean you can heighten your cause to celtic traditions.
Chaodoom: the viking doesn't need an animal to keep him company
mrsewan: and i don't care how many times you saw aladdin with cece chao.
Chaodoom: that's why he has an axe
mrsewan: that's arabic you twit.
Chaodoom: hah hah. lookeehere. ad hominem
Chaodoom: the last refuge of the desperate debater
Chaodoom: let's try to stick to the facts, please
Chaodoom: namely
Chaodoom: the fact
Chaodoom: that pirates are in every way subservient to the noble viking
Chaodoom: in fact
Chaodoom: i grant you one thing
Chaodoom: pirates are indeed a derivative of vikings
Chaodoom: but they are just that: derivative
Chaodoom: they've dumbed it down
mrsewan: you do not have permission to transcribe this debate.
mrsewan: FUCK YOU and ALL PEOPLE.
mrsewan: ESPECIALLY the vikings
Chaodoom: they've cluttered it with bullshit that detracts from the sole purpose of the viking:
Chaodoom: slaughter. for profit.
mrsewan: and if pirates are just derivative of vikings
mrsewan: than taiwanese people are just derivative of chinese
Chaodoom: do i really not have permission?
mrsewan: then taiwanese people*
Chaodoom: because we made a pretty good debate here
mrsewan: if you fix my spelling errors.
mrsewan: use it
Chaodoom: as assiduously as i've been fixing my own
Chaodoom: RAWK
mrsewan: hahaha
mrsewan: we are terrible preservationists.
Chaodoom: no argument there.